Skip to content
Sell From Love

Two Types of Selling— Which one do you use?

Love or Fear

There are two ways to sell. You can sell from love or you can sell from fear.

At any given time, you are selling in one of these two constructs.

Selling from love looks seamless and feels like you’re flowing downstream. It may not always be easy, but you walk away invigorated and energized, just like you feel after a good workout.

When you sell from love you look like you— meaning you’re not pretending to be someone you’re not. You’re authentic and you use your personality to connect with clients.

When you sell from love, you’re generous and you strive to give your clients the best options. Their interests come first. Selling from love doesn’t mean that fear is not present at times; what it means is that you don’t let it stop you from moving forward.

Selling from love means you act with courage and non-attachment to a specific outcome. When you sell from love, your road to success is wide open, unscripted, and organic. You can look to others for best practices and ideas on how to sell better or more, but know that when you embrace this philosophy, it’s a personal journey and a customized road to success.

This approach is creative, steeped in abundance and has an expanded winner’s circle. This means that there is a win for your client, for you the professional, for your company, for the community you live and work in, and for the world too!

“When stakeholders feel loved by a business, they will tend to love the business back and appreciate the value it is creating for them.

That means more than a transaction – it builds the experience of a community.

And an authentic community is practically the holy grail of business brands in today’s world.

How many marketing dollars are thrown away trying to manufacture a community around a brand, when a little bit of authentic love would go so much further?”   

– John Mackey, CEO Whole Foods

What is fear?

Selling from fear, on the other hand, can look desperate and needy. Instead of ease and flow, you’re frantic, awkward, and stumbling.

Selling from fear is rushed and hurried: you need to close the sale quickly or rush the client through the selling process so you can hit your target by the end of the month. When selling from fear, you lack natural confidence, so either you’re holding back because of doubt or you’re overcompensating by being overconfident and coming across as the know-it-all expert.

Selling from fear feels “salesy”. It’s that impression you don’t want to experience or leave with your clients. Consider the impact it has on your client. Selling from love lets your client know you care about them. They feel supported, understood, and they feel that you “get them”.

When you sell from fear your client feels like a number. They lose trust in you and this drives a wedge between you and clients. They feel confused and scared. When you sell from fear, clients sense it, and that fear will permeate through your relationship. They’ll feel hustled and pressured, and they may end up buying from fear.

You don’t want your clients to buy from fear. It will prevent you from building long-lasting relationships, creating advocates for your brand, and delivering a meaningful transformation.

Fear buys transactions: love fulfills a transformation. When you sell from love, you’ve created the perfect let’s work together invitation for your client.

Here’s a quick snapshot of these two types of selling? Which one do you find yourself in more often?

Selling From Love vs Fear

Now it’s over to you: What does selling from love versus fear look like for you? What is the impact on you and your client?

I’d love to hear for you!  Shoot me over an email:

Can’t wait to hear from you!

With love,


Stay Connected

PS: Have you heard about the Sell From Love Community?

This is a free, community of like-minded and like-spirited leaders, business owners and professionals who are devoted to showing up with authentic integrity, expanding their reach, and making a bigger impact.

Putting yourself out there, running a business or standing up in your leadership takes courage, conviction, and commitment. You don’t need to go it alone.

Each month I host live coaching calls where we explore the principles of how to Sell From Love.

We talk daily in our ‘off social media’ community network, I don’t want you to get distracted or fall prey to social media’s tactics to pull you away from your agenda, so we are not on Facebook.

My agenda is to keep you aligned to your agenda. Plus, each quarter we gather to do business planning, so you stay on track and feel supported to make big moves and hit your goals.

One of our members said this recently about our community call:

“I think about the time I spend on social media looking at everyone else’s ideas, playing ping pong with my brain, where as this call helped me focus more on my business and be prepared and feel ready to take on what’s next.”

Now wouldn’t you want some of this?

Join the Sell From Love Community where together, we build a better way to sell, work and live.

To learn more visit:

Share on:

Book a Discovery Call

Take your sales team and leaders from Transactional Selling to Transformational Selling ™